Friday, July 30, 2010

The Tooth Fairy *NOT FOR CHILDREN*

My 9 1/2-year old son lost his first molar last night so we had to talk about the Tooth Fairy.

"It's you, right?"

"What do you think?" I said. I hate to just blow up beliefs. My husband, on the other hand, was dying to tell our kids there was no Santa Claus from the time they were four.

"I think it's you. I mean, what would the Tooth Fairy do with all those teeth?"

"It is me."

"So, what do YOU do with all those teeth?"

Cut to this morning: I had put his tooth in a plastic baggie prior to the Tooth Fairy discussion in case he still believed and wanted to put it under his pillow. (Note to young parents: I've learned that putting the tooth in a baggie makes it MUCH easier to find in the middle of the night when you're digging around under your kid's pillow in the dark trying not to wake them up.) He came down this morning holding the baggie-with-tooth aloft.

"Aha! Look what I found!"

"I'm sorry," I said. "Do you want a dollar?"

"No," he said. "I'll just wait for tonight."

He's putting it BACK under his pillow tonight! He knows there's no Tooth Fairy. He knows that I'm going to sneak in in the middle of the night and fish around for the baggie and leave him a dollar and, apparently, that's the way he likes it. He is the King of Suspended Disbelief.

Sometimes I wish I had someone to explain my own son to me.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Curse You Cindy Crawford and Art Van!

My husband and I went shopping last night for some chairs for our family room and living room. We live with two semi-destructive cats and one of the chairs needing replacement is older than our relationship.

We ended up at Art Van. We've gotten pretty lucky there over the past few years. And, sure enough, we came across a really comfortable brown leather chair and a patterned fabric chair that went along with it. The leather felt great and the chairs were everything we wanted; not too big, no floppy cushions, veeeery comfortable, go with our decor. We looked at everything else in the store because we didn't want to marry the first chairs we met but ended up back at the original chairs ready to pull out the credit card and then I looked at the tag.

They are Cindy Crawford chairs.

I'm mortified.

I don't buy into celebrities "designing" clothes or furniture or whatever, or slapping their name on something so it will sell better. It bugs me. I don't want to wear Jessica Simpson shoes or Daisy Fuentes jeans (though I WILL wear a Betty White hoody because IT'S BETTY WHITE!). Plus, when my husband and I started dating he had a Cindy Crawford calendar hanging in his room and I remember saying to him "If you expect me to sit in here and eat jelly beans with you then the calendar must come down." Yet here's Cindy, back in our life. Supporting my husband's tush while he reads. I don't think I like it.

But, damn her, the chairs are SO comfortable. I put up a fight for a while but in the end we bought the chairs and they are being delivered next week. So, come on over and sit on my Cindy Crawford chairs. Tell me how comfortable and pretty they are. I'll still be embarrassed.

PS - If you find yourself in need of Supermodel Furniture head to Art Van in Royal Oak and ask for Ray. I liked him so much I plan to see him for all my Supermodel Furniture needs : )

PPS - Yes, kids. When my husband and I were dating and were alone in his room we ate jellybeans. That is all we did. That is all anyone should do. Until they're married.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Why Are All Realtors Named Nancy?

The last time we went house hunting our realtor was named Nancy. We are now dipping our toes in the house search pool again and found a house we'd like to check out and the realtor listing the house is named .... Nancy. We talked to Nancy the 2nd who is out of town but promised to have an associate call us who is named ... Nancy.

What's up with this? Was Nancy just a ridiculously popular name from that generation or are all women named Nancy immediately told to pursue real estate when they take the Possible Careers Quiz in high school? And if that's true, then is it possible that the people putting out these Find Your Best Career worksheets aren't really taking our interests and skills into consideration but merely lumping us into categories alphabetically? And why am I going straight to a conspiracy theory?