I crack myself up

So, on July 13, Neal Rubin invited us to enter a contest.

So, I did. I like a good contest. And I like Detroit. Sometimes against my better judgment, and sometimes in spite of myself, and sometimes in spite of all the CRAP that I have to read about every day.

And sometimes in spite of the fact that it's usually difficult to READ about what's going in Detroit because I don't get the paper delivered every day....and can't even read it online when my power goes out....but I digress.

Anyway, if you're not a link-clicker, the contest is to come up with a motto/slogan for Detroit. The column is really about David Lewis, who coined the slogan "Detroit, where the weak are killed and eaten" and I acknowledge that will be incredibly difficult to top. But, here are my entries. I think any of them will look great on a t-shirt.

Detroit - It Tastes Like Chicken!

Detroit - If You Seek A Disappointing Public Official, Look Around You

Detroit - If You Can Make It Here You'll Probably Find A Much Better Job Somewhere Else

Detroit - At Least The Unemployment Isn't As High As The Dropout Rate

Yes, I realize they're all derivative and childish and ...whatever! My favorite is still #2. Really, don't we just have the market cornered?