My daughter has a text from the future saved on her phone. It is from the year 2019 and the phone number has a semicolon in it ("There'll be so many phone numbers by then that they'll NEED semicolons!"). Today her friend also received a text from the future; the phone number didn't have a semi-colon and when he dialed it, it was a land-line. Of course, land-lines will probably be obsolete in 2019, but who am I to dispel beliefs?
Maybe a normal parent would point this out. I am apparently NOT a normal parent because I do things like A) contribute to an advice column on the U by Kotex website, B) take skating lessons, C) teach writer's workshops to 4th graders, and D) participate in dance competitions even though I "don't have a background in dance."
So, my question is: what do normal parents do? When I was growing up my mom was a painter and my dad played the clarinet, listened to opera on Sunday afternoons, and did magic tricks at the dinner table so I don't think I really have a reference point. And, is it bad that I'm not a normal parent? Am I raising children that have no concept of reality, or am I simply raising children who will be non-normal parents as well? And, really, if raising "non-normal parents" is the worst parenting I do then I will consider myself a success but now I have to stop typing because I am really sore from the dancing and the skating.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago