Dear Tiny Little Irritations:
I realize that you are tiny and by yourself you are meaningless and THAT is why you feel the need to show up in gangs and I know it's easy to act all big and tough when there are lots of you but let me tell you that I am in NO MOOD to deal with any of you today (although one of you did almost make me cry; note how I said almost because I refuse to give you the satisfaction) and I will slowly and methodically stomp you out like the bugs that you are.
It may not be today, it may not even be tomorrow, but consider yourself warned that I will be through with all of you by the end of the week (or, at the very least, the end of the month). ALL OF YOU!
Love and Kisses,
On open letter to the lady in my neighborhood:
6 hours ago