I've never been one of those girls with a sexy walk or way of moving or even, if I'm totally honest, a sexy way of doing anything. You know how some girls look sexy just standing around breathing? Somehow that gene passed me by. And I've not done anything in my life so far that has forced me to take on a sexier persona - I managed to land a husband and have a couple kids by being cute, funny, and little bit bossy. So, now that I'm taking dancing lessons I'm being forced to confront my lack of sexiness. Today, for a good 20 minutes I was practically date-raping a pole at the dance studio trying to learn how to manipulate my body in a sexier manner. And my partner had to bring out Anastasia, The Queen of Wiggling, to show me how to do a move that most 4-year olds know how to do these days thanks to Dancing With The Stars and Miley Cyrus.
Is there a pill I can take? A manual I can read? Somehow there has to be a way for me to learn how to do what 90% of the female population inherently knows. Or maybe I should just give up and buy a Tin Man costume to dance in because THAT's what I'm going to look like anyway.
Giants are terrible cooks
1 day ago