All month I've been spitting into test tubes (did I warn you that this post was about spit? Sorry. My bad.) and collecting them in my freezer (much to my family's disgust) so I can get my hormone levels tested because I. Am. Getting. Old.
Apparently I'm also hopeless because I've screwed up the test.
I had all these days marked in my calendar that I'm supposed to do the test (i.e. collect saliva) and I thought the last day (where I have to do it, like, 8 different times during the day) was tomorrow but just looked at my calendar and I was supposed to do it today.
Stupid stupid stupid.
I'm going to do it tomorrow and send it in and hope it doesn't screw up my whole month of not eating and/or drinking coffee in the morning until the collection time was over. I'm SO MAD at myself.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago