I'm trying to pay attention to the news while not being distracted by how. very. badly. my entire house needs to be vacuumed and then Sam Riddle gets interviewed after being let out of jail and starts going OFF on Kym Worthy and how her office is full of "chaos and disorder" or something (my short-term memory is shot, my apologies) and then Sam's lawyer comes on and why does Sam Riddle's attorney need a spray tan? Why?
These are the things that keep me up at night when I should be getting to bed early so I can be funny in the morning!
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago