I love eggnog and only drink it between Thanksgiving and January 1 and have a message for all you Bob-Greene-Jillian-Michaels-uber-skinny-endorphin-fueled-making-your-money-by-making-me-feel-fat "experts" -- I don't care if eggnog is a 'liquid cheeseburger,' and from Thursday until January 1 I will be sitting in a corner with my eggnog and a bottle of brandy and my fingers in my ears going "lalalalalalalalala" so I don't have to listen to you.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago