I try not to obsess about celebrities too much but came face-to-face with Heather Locklear’s mug shot online today and … did she do something to her lips? They’re all unnaturally puffy and uneven and you think these actresses would maybe talk to each other about this. Though maybe Meg Ryan is sitting with Heather right now saying “Honey, just lay off the lip injections. I know they make you feel young and bouncy and they really take the focus off the botox around your eyes but it is a slippery slope, sister, and it leads to nothing but misery and humiliation.”
And I’m the last person who should even mention this as I finally made the appointment for my second hair coloring of the year today, but the ROOTS! Doesn’t Loreal give her a few boxes of the hair coloring she pimps for to keep around the house? I think that really proves that she was depressed not drunk because when you are the representative of BLONDE you don’t leave the house looking like that unless you are really really down. Though she did remember to put mascara on, even if she didn’t apply it very well.
I am tired of being told that celebrities are “just like us.” Of course they are so you don’t need to show us. If they are depressed and want to hit the Piggly-Wiggly for some self-medicating ice cream, leave them alone. Don't take a picture and post it all over the internet. If I want to see someone with jacked up makeup and 2 inch roots I will look in the mirror.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago