According to my clairvoyant friend, Camille, we are everyone in our dreams.
So I've spent today trying to figure out why I'm Bradley Cooper, an incredibly hot, talented, and wealthy actor who is 11 years younger than me and went to a much better school.
Last night I dreamed we were starring in a movie together and even had a make-out scene (ok, it was really a sex scene but I fear that makes me sound pervy).
I just really wanted to tell everyone about that dream.
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
1 day ago