Saturday, September 13, 2008

The rain, the rain

I am going insane from being trapped in the house all day. I realize that a steady hard rain in Michigan is nothing like what they are enduring in Texas and is not really enough to keep me in the house if I had a serious or important or fun destination – but the very gray wetness of it has kept me in the house all day, mostly on-line.

In my defense, I cleaned the house, wrote most of an article, conducted a phone interview, updated one of my many pointless websites, and uploaded a video of my son’s freaky toe to YouTube. So it’s not like I didn’t accomplish stuff. My husband and I also managed to include our 13-year old daughter in a heated political discussion and our 7-year old son in a heated tents-vs.-cabin-on-a-Boy-Scout-Camp-Out discussion. (Both arguments remain unresolved).

Now I’m back to flipping through those AOL headlines which are either really attention-grabbing or incredibly stupid. It’s like AOL hires EITHER incredibly sarcastic former Esquire writers OR recent GED grads. Today’s headline was:

Jessica Engaged to Longtime Beau?
They're 'This Close' to Getting Married

And I swear the FIRST thing that went through my mind was “Oh my God, please don’t let that sweet Tony Romo who just changed that nice couple’s tire be getting married to Jessica Simpson!” I may have promised my son’s freaky toe in exchange if only it weren’t true and when I clicked on it I realized the story was about Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel who I think are getting engaged simply to get themselves back in the headlines.

Seriously, I had a VAGUE idea of who Tony Romo even is (football player, dates blonde starlets, yadda yadda yadda) until the changing-the-tire story came out and now I’m as proud of him as his own mother. Now I WANT to watch football and want my son to play football and be a tire-changing hero too.

And I’m sure part of my reaction is due to an interview with Jessica Simpson that was featured on some website yesterday that headlined: Jessica says she’s really smart.

If you’re REALLY smart, you don’t have to tell people. Take your brand new cowboy boots and your square dancing skirt and your big-ass can of hairspray and go home.

I SO need to get out of the house.

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